I’ve experienced loss; I’ve lost friends, lovers and even myself. But none of my previous losses prepared me to the heartbreak of your loss.
None of the losses i previously experienced hurt me as much as you loss, you’ve left with no goodbye, with no warning, and as i saw you leaving- i stood there watching my whole world crashing and falling down into pieces, a small tiny pieces that no one- not even i can pick them and glue them again.
The loss of you left me in loss of words, of all the losses; you leaving this world broke my heart the most, growing up the only warm arms i ever known were yours. I watched the world we built together, the future we planned and all the dreams we drew fall and sink in my ocean; the ocean i created with my tears.
When you left, you opened the door widely to all my fears, tears and past traumas leaving me thinking why am i even alive? How can i live in a place where everyone broke my heart? You were the only one to mend it, but now that you’re gone and you’ll never be back, no one can ever mend it.
You might not be the first to break my heart, but you were my worst heartbreak-the heartbreak that i will never heal from.
All the i love you’s you once said, and the take care’s keep playing in my mind like a melody, if you meant it why would you ever leave like that?
Why would you leave shutting the door so i couldn’t follow nor see you ever again, but opening the door to my locked fears, the fears that now haunt me in my dreams and in my awaken they knock me to my knees, i keep calling your name when they do, but you’re no where to be found.
You promised you’ll always be here for me when everyone else leaves, yet you were the first to leave. You promised that one day I’ll find the happiness, but all im finding now is void consuming me, and blades pleading me every night to end my life-Soon I’ll obey.
You left unlocking a very unpleasant and unwelcomed thought that only you, knew how to stop me from doing it- i held the blade looking at it, so tempting i held it waiting for you to lock that door, but how can you lock it this time if you were the one to open it widely.
I fell down and watched my blood flowing, how can you ever rest in peace, and find the ending to your story-You may have found the ending to your story, but i had to create mine.
You left and you said that you now found peace but how can you ever find peace when you’ve shattered my soul to a million piece?
Bittersweet love 