October

She’s made of stardust and roses, she moves the way the sun moves , and i hide each time the way the moon do

She tastes like liquor and cigarettes, a mixture that is so cancerous yet so pleasingly tasteful

She’s made of stardust and roses, so delicate yet so full of thorns that would make you bleed in seconds

One word from her, and it would either lift me up and make me feel so loved or make me hit the ground so hard that i wouldn’t even feel my heart breaking.

She said goodbye the way she hugged me hello for the first time, she looked me in the eyes, and said its not my fault when her silence was so loud that it crashed my walls down

And guilt came creeping in like an old friend that i haven’t seen for a while.

She sat in silence and so did it, memorising every move she does, to remember how good she was to my heart

Although my head was yelling at me to run away, to hide from her the way the moon does when the sun rises.

She said her goodbye so easily, and as she pronounced each syllable all the stardusts i saw in her turned to meteors that burned my heart.

And my knees went weak, so weak that i bended and begged for a chance, a chance to fix what i never meant to break

And while she was standing there in front of me in one piece my peace fell to the ground to pieces.

And although she said her last words and promised that she’d never change her mind, my eyes pleaded hers to look at me with the warmth she once had.

She lied next to me and hugged me tight so tight and although we lied in complete silence i swear i heard the way my heart cracked when she hugged me tight, it cracked so loudly that i felt the whole room spinning.

She hugged me goodbye the way she hugged me hello for the first time

She kissed my cheek and whispered that i will be fine

As if fixing your heart with bloody hands can be done within seconds.

I opened my doors for you in October so lovingly , and you slammed the doors behind you as October ended.

And we fell the way the leaves do, in October